I would assume that one of the most well known portions of the book of Ephesians is the part dealing with the family as found in the end of chapter 5 and beginning of chapter 6. Most of us know Ephesians 5:22-6:4 by heart. We have read the blogs, we have heard the sermons, and we have done the Bible studies. We understand God’s plan for the family. However, today I would like to back up just a couple verses and see what God says.
Ephesians 5:20 “Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;”
God begins in chapter 4 dealing with the behavior of the believer. These are very rich chapters with a lot of instruction for us. We would be very wise to learn what God expects from us and to apply them to our lives. Let’s focus on chapter 5 verse 20. After all of this instruction, He commands us to give thanks for all things. He gives us this right before going into the instruction for the family. This was not done by accident.
Could it be because gratitude is necessary in our homes? I sure think so. When is the last time you told your spouse that you are thankful for them and all they do for you? Maybe it has been awhile. Today is the day to start telling them that you are grateful for them. What about the last time you thanked God for your spouse and marriage? This shouldn’t be a foreign concept to us! Shame on us for not being grateful people!
What about your children? If you are a parent, I hope you are thanking God often for your children and for the privilege to be a parent. Those children are from God, they belong to Him, and we have been entrusted to raise them for His honor and glory. They should hear how much we love and appreciate them. You are modeling what a home and marriage should be like. Teach them well.
This is not always easy. We are not perfect people. But God knows that. He knows the bad days that are ahead. He knows the trials that will come. He knows some of you are married to difficult spouses. He knows some of you are ready to throw in the towel and call it quits. HE KNOWS. Yet, He said to give thanks for ALL things. That’s a tall order, isn’t it? On any given day most of us can have at least a handful of reasons to complain about our spouse rather than give thanks, but we must learn to obey God’s Word.
Are you giving thanks to God for your marriage? Did you know that unthankfulness leads to discontentment. Unthankfulness causes us to focus on our struggles, imperfections, and differences. We begin to see things through our limited perspectives. Then we justify our poor behavior. This is not God’s intention for our homes. He desires us to be focused on HIM and the blessings He has given us. There is no joy in discontentment. God has said we should have joy in our lives. We have much to rejoice about! 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 “Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”
So what happens if we leave the discontentment untreated? Bitterness springs up in our hearts. Bitterness is not just being upset with your spouse. It is much deeper than that. Bitterness leads to division and to complete destruction. Do you truly want to be bitter against your spouse? Are you okay with living that way? I sure hope not.
Satan’s desires have not changed. Jesus said in John 10:10 “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” Paul warns in 1 Peter 5:8 “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:”
God wants your marriage to be a joyful union. One that reflects His love, mercy, grace, and goodness. We cannot accomplish that outside of His instructions. If you aren’t thankful for your spouse, your focus will be shifted easily from God’s goodness to your spouse’s imperfections.
Your marriage has been designed by God. He wants to help it thrive and last a lifetime. We must trust Him and follow the blueprint He has given to us in His Word. Being thankful reminds us that our spouse really is a blessing, that we love them, and we are in this until death do us part. We cannot make this thing work without God, we just can’t. The sooner we realize that and tap into His wisdom, the better off we will be.
If you want things to improve, be grateful. Do not use your spouse’s behavior, your emotions, or past hurts to stop you from showing your gratitude. Begin being a grateful spouse TODAY. Obey God’s Word and let Him use your obedience to transform your marriage. He just may be waiting for us to change our hearts and attitudes before He can begin to work in our marriages.
With hope in His service
Heather
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